ask yourself: how did i get here

Lance Armstrong Foundation

i have been doing a lot of reflecting on my goals in general. how i spend my time. how i spend my money. how i take care of my body (or don’t take care of it as the case may be) and i have been reorganizing it all.  prioritizing it. school is done. its time for a few new challenges. a few different challenges. and its time for me to contribute to someone else besides me.

the march of dimes has always been a part of ‘what i do.’ and it’s a great organization. but it’s not touched me personally in a very long time. it takes so much of my time and my energy. i really truly enjoy it.

but i’m ready to do something for a fight that has more directly impacted me.  that has forever changed and shaped who i am and who i grew up to to be. who i’m still growing up to be. a fight i have avoided, but that i’m ready to embrace. a fight that has impacted so many people in my family in such a powerful variety of ways.

cancer.

cancer took my mother.

it took the love of my dad’s life.

it took my cousins’ father and my aunt’s husband.

it took two of my grandmother’s children.

its taking someone from my aunt, uncle and cousins slowly and painfully.

its going to continue to do it too. to touch us all in a way that is so horrible an inexplicable.

and it’s time for me to stand up to it in new ways.

i have a mix of races running through my head and a mix of goals i want to set for myself. running. cycling. triathlons. all of them make me so excited i can hardly sit still. but i can’t do them all at once.  i am not qualified to train like that.  and up until recently, i have not been able to make any decisions.  then it hit me and i knew exactly what i would do.

i will ride and run in a livestrong challenge in 2010.

and i will learn to treat my own body with as much respect as possible.

and i will raise as much money i can to keep other’s from dying.

to make sure as few women grow up without mothers as possible.

to make sure that the next girl’s dad grows old with his wife.

to make sure that less mothers have to outlive their children.

i feel so passionately about this decision and it makes me so excited to commit! so, i’ll hope you share my excitement and i’ll keep you posted along the way.

—

the lance armstrong foundation is a fairly efficient group.  there are certainly more efficient groups. but i think it has more than efficiency going for them. it has lance, who is a damn strong spokesperson. it has a face and a presence in the fight against cancer that is exceedingly public.  it has a voice that reaches people and messages that are getting out there.  the channels of communication, the resources at its disposal, make it a group that i think can and does accomplish a great deal.  these are some of the main reasons i’m choosing to participate in the livestrong challenge.

the other reason is that i was inspired.  a man who goes by the fat cyclist has inspired me. several months ago i clicked through to his blog from another of my ABSOLUTE FAVORITES (the pioneer woman) who was hosting a contest to raise money on behalf of team fatty for the lance armstrong foundation.  the prize was something photography related, which i was stoked about. and the donation required to be in the drawing was well worth my money so i clicked through and i donated. and got sucked into the fat cyclist and his story.

to say i lost productivity at work that day would be an understatement. i closed the door to my office and cried my way through, remembering my family’s struggle and knowing there was nothing i could do to comfort him or his children. and remained a faithful follower as the months went on. this man lost his wife, the mother of four young children in a horrifying battle with cancer. his story touched me.  it jolted me. he is an avid rider who reached out to LAF for advice and quickly found a way to put his anger and compassion to work by forming Team Fatty.

Team Fatty rode in all four rides of the challenge and raised the largest amount of money a single team has ever raised.  and they did it like a family full of love and support.

that’s a team i can and want to be a part of fighting a fight i can and want to fight. Elden, I’ll see you in Philly!